rats, cats and all things dead.

Shoba
A cat someone killed this morning hanging from a tree
its entrails
me at Ngollos shop with DJ YP
the big bug! i have another picture but running out of time to post. it has big red spots. I've only seen a few, but honestly they're huge.
mama kilis fruit shop, more or less the same as every other one although this is in their front yard, not the main road. A pineapples 40 cents, as is 5 bananas. the sugar canes ten cents. I don't know how much the avocados are.
mama kili and kili, her daughter. Kili kind of creeps me out. She'll say "Shangazi look" a lot and when I look she's eating bugs or her boogers or something.
Agu, who thinks its really funny to hit me and chase me with sticks. He can actually do some damage for such a little guy.
Schemgas are good for some things, like imitating Indians. Ngollo probably wouldn't be happy knowing this is online though. Not that I think she'd really know what online means.

me and Agustino at the wedding, before his days of "carry a big stick" policy.

Shangazi/Auntie cooking ugali. The kitchens totally grim
me and Chau around the time I first arrived. I can't say I feel so fondly towards her now, as her main way of getting what she wants is crying for half an hour.
the little village of Ujiji. Here a fire truck is filling up at the lake.
Inside Ngollos perfume/CD shop. Although I think she's quitting soon.

kangas drying in the village at Deus's real grandmothers home.

the bride at the wedding, no they don't wear white. And she really didn't smile once. Ngollo said she was afraid.
me looking on at the wedding with bena and mama Agu behind us. MamaAgu has a really unique face and I kind Julian would draw a picture of her for me.
the girls in purple sung at the wedding and i have a short video of it.
i had to pretend like i took this by accident at the wedding but i like it a good deal.
some not so subtle nike advertising, i can't remember if i posted this before but i just found it so amazing, its someones house!
me in Tarime with a teacher and woman who started her own womans group in Tarime. This was a pretty long time ago now though.
me all dressed and ready for the wedding. yeah i wore a dress... but i had shorts on underneath
bena, Deus's sister, Ngollo (turns out ive been spelling her name wrong), mama kili, and mama agu, with agu.

and some recent adventures:
a few days ago, eyeing auntie crushing peanuts to make some sort of oil or butter I suddenly became overwhelmingingly nostalgic for my vegan cake days and had a strong desire to cook something (the oven is definately the modern appliance I miss most). Of course everyones convinced I can't cook because I dont know how to skin a tomato while holding it in my palm, in under 30 seconds. Still I convinced Auntie to let me cut up the spinach. Of course this entails nothing resembling a cutting board or counter space so youre doing it in your hand again. About 30 seconds in I took a handful of spinach in one hand, and pressed down into it with a knife with the other ( in my defense this seemed safe and rational because every knife I've encountered so far has been dull as a rock.) Unfortunately this time it led to little puddle of blood in the nooks of my fingers and a handful of wasted spinach. I put a band-aid on and didn't mention it to anyone for fear my reputation as a cook would sink further. I adopted a new cutting strategy and eventually finished the job. It's a good thing I got my tetnous shot though.
I also had a very welcome chat with Ngollo which entailed her informing me that people with boobs as small as mine don't normally wear bras in this country. I went almost immediately to take it off and haven't seen it since. By the way someone remind me to give the bra back to Dani, if she still wants it.
The there was the long, example filled, explanation of the American belief that kids should get the heck out of the house before they're 20. Ngollo couldn't figure out why anyones parents would kick them out or even more strange why some kids would want to leave. It's a weird cultural thing to think about because my bet is that it came about as a result of government schooling ending at 18. So in the 1800's did kids hang out with mom and pops until they were 40? Here they hang out until they get married, even if that means forever. Ngollo decided she liked her culture better then ours on that one.
Another cultural aspect I've picked up lately in the Tanzanian belief, of course only in some people, that being a socialist and living in a socialist state makes a person nice and trustworthy and living in a capatalistic state causes them to be greedy and hoarding. I read online that public infrastructure in America, like roads, they're considering selling to private companies because they don't have money for the upkeep. I can see someone looking back 50 years from now and saying God that was a bad idea. Assuming the Earth lasts that long.
I bought some new t-shirts as well. Can't keep me away from a good t-shirt. One about animal testing with that quote that goes something like "an atrocity is no less of an atrocity when it occurs in a laboratory and is called scientific research", if that isn't the exact quote. It has a little cartoon accompanying it. I mainly found it funny that it was in Africa. I got another one that's a tank top with drawn on cross necklaces. how Urban Outfitter. Tank tops are nice though, the weathers been getting hotter. Last night I hardly got any sleep and I finally got up, took off my pants and slept in someones slip that was hanging in the room.
Deus is still sick so its been decided I'll go to Gombe alone. Theres no food there so today or tomorrow I'll do some grocery shopping. I'm going friday night and leaving Saturday evening and Sunday we take the bus to Mwanza. Monday I'll be in Musoma. Next month or maybe it was the one after Deus is making a show with the discovery channel about one of his projects so he's going to be pretty busy.
Truthfully I'm surprised I've been able to shrink away from responsibility for this long in my life. I'm still as lazy as I was in high school. Still not really working. Just kind of hanging out for two years. Ngollo keeps asking me why I don't like school and I told her I like to study on my own, which she can clearly observe but this doesn't satisfy her. Anyways now I'm reading a book about Evolutionary Psychology (of the same title). Some of its clearly bullshit. Like they question why women would have affairs in their marriage and they mention sperm competition but not that maybe the woman just have crappy husbands. There was one quote I liked though (also possibly not true): "sexual selection explains the origins of cultural dimorphism (male domination of political, economic and cultural life) by male efforts to acquire material resources for attracting and keeping females. On this basis, the production of art, music and literature functions primarily as a courtship display". It's an interesting theory at least.
It doesn't explain why I want to make art so badly though. I've definitely another luxury. I have the time but not the resources. A few half working pens and some lined paper although I have been doodling, bugs, rats, birds and that cat with its tumbo out. Painting and making collages is on my list of 4o something things to do when I return though.
This blog is totally taking advantage of my love of writing. Thankfully I'll be busy the next few days so next time I post I'll have some actual news.